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[Parenting] Parental attitudes of growing into a strong independent child

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It may sound a bit sad that your child may be better off being free from parents. But this is true. The most important part that parents can give their children is self-reliance and self-reliance, which allows them to believe that they are capable and able individuals to take care of themselves.

Developed by falling apart from parents

Parents today spend more time with their children than before, but it can happen when a child is far away from his mother and father. Let's hear the story of Dr. Michael Thomspon, author of "Homesick and Happy: How Time Between Parents Grow Children". He wrote his experience as a consulting psychologist in the Canoe Travel Camp in a parent magazine. Thompson said that every summer he feels victory by completing camps even when children are trapped in dirt, mosquito bites, and thunderstorms.

At first, there were fears and doubts, but they showed a noticeable growth through their experience. Thompson said that if parents were at camp, the children would not have made a leap.

Grow as an independent adult

Over the years, he has been asking people the most memorable memories of his childhood. He asked if he had parents in those memories. As a result, about 20% of parents were part of their happiest childhood memories, and 80% said their parents were not memorable.

Thompson emphasizes that parents should stay away from their children. "It does not mean unconditionally leaving the child. Children can fall from their parents because they can become more productive, independent, moral, and beloved young adults. "

Meanwhile, Barbara Greenberg, a teen, child and family psychologist, recently recommended US News Health to ask her whether she was emotionally and cognitively prepared before she offered her independence. For example, a parent might consider keeping a child alone for 30 minutes. If the child is satisfied, he / she can gradually increase the time, such as staying at home alone for an hour.

Be careful about independence

Dr. Greenberg said there is an unexpected challenge to independence. For example, a stranger can approach and discomfort a child. You should talk and direct about various cases, including the story of "Do not talk to strangers and go straight home".

It is also important to raise self-control

Katie Hurley, a child and youth psychotherapist, said that it is not easy to set limits because children can also be negotiators. To raise self-control, parents should consider their emotional health and social skills as well as their physical health.

It is a good practice to teach good eating habits or teach them to cook good eating habits. You need to think about how much you will allow cookies and how much time you will spend on outdoor play. Children should set their sleeping times so that sleep cycles remain constant to avoid emotional, attention, and learning disabilities.

For emotional health, emotional coaching becomes a part of setting limits. Training for the child to control his emotions is helpful when the child is away from home. It is also important to express your feelings in words, relax in a healthy way and have a break for recharging.

Dr. Hurley added that children should help them build social skills so they can take on roles when they engage with others or group activities. It is also good to have a simple practice of greeting or saying farewell. You can try a role-play about how to get into your kids and peer group.

If you are familiar with some of these restrictions, you can make good choices and leave your independence, even if you leave your home, Dr. Hurley said.

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