What if your child is sexually abused? It's a terrible thing I do not even want to imagine as a parent. In particular, sexual offenses are traumatic, and the trauma continues even after the family has become an adult.
Parents are not as heartwarming and shocking as they know that their child has become a target of sexual assault and has been the subject of attacks for many years. Especially in the case of pedophilia, I first approach like a friend to gain and control the trust of the child, to intimidate the sexual exploitation,
It would be best for no parent to suffer such terrible pain, fear, and paranoia. To do this, we must educate our children so that they can protect themselves from sex offenders from childhood.
Online grooming
Today, almost all of us live a life linked to mobile and social media. The Internet is now more of a necessity than a simple leisure life. My children also live with their smartphones before they learn how to walk and play.
The Internet makes our lives convenient in many aspects. Communication, entertainment, learning, housework, even lighting off. It is good to enjoy the benefits of technology like this, but as with everything else, there is also contrast. Online grooming is a cancerous aspect of technology.
"Grooming is the act of forming trust and attachment relationships with minors for the purpose of sexual exploitation, satisfaction and abuse." "Online gender grooming is done through means such as social media or messaging platforms," said Cyber Wellness. said.
"In recent years, online grooming crime has increased in Singapapole. "In April last year, a 20-year-old boy was charged with sexually harassing young girls in social media and committing sex crimes against 10 of them." Some of the victims were 12-year-olds. "
Parenting Information Website According to Smart Phantom, the main actors of sex offenders are Facebook, Instagram, Snap Chat, Twitter, and Internet games. In these places, grooming is done using young children as a target.
Social welfare activist Abdul Rahman Kamarudin told sex offenders, "Once they set a target child, they first approach and hide their identity. "It is said to have a similar interest to the target child, and I would like to encourage the child to buy various gifts or show interest."
Sex offenders use this strategy to gain trust in their children first. It is a way of bringing out sexual topics, inducing conversation, and revealing the color. It is suggested that we exchange photographs taken with secret body parts, or meet them directly, but these encounters often end with rape.
Children are often curious and do not know much about sex. Sex offenders use these curiosities to draw sexual conversations with their children.
Jainin Sander, author of The Secret That Must not Stay, says on his Domestic Shelder website, "I think many parents will probably be victims of sex crimes," but " Show that you can catch people. One in five girls, and one in twenty, are victims of child sex crimes. "
"Adults such as parents, carers and teachers should not only tell children about sex crimes, but also look to see if they are being sexually abused, such as grooming," he said. "Simply ask the children to be injured because they are afraid and uncomfortable. It should not be neglected. "
Children can raise their awareness of sex crimes by just telling them the proper name of the penis and by respecting the child's physical boundaries and distance.
Meanwhile, Yao coach said, "When children are very young, we should talk about sexuality using content appropriate to their age." "It teaches young children 'good' and 'bad' "You have to teach them what to do when they want to see the site or talk about sex."
Online grooming warning indicators
According to Yao and Rahman, early signs of online grooming are very difficult to detect. Children are trying to hide on this topic. The most common signs are:
1. I do not sleep until late at night, I am doing something online.
2. I do not want to live too far from my cell phone or social media account or show it to others.
3. Parents are hesitant or angry when they ask to see online chat
4. You get gifts from friends your parents do not know, or new things that you can not afford with clothes or other children's allowance.
5. Tell him that you have a boyfriend or girlfriend who is older than you and that you met online.
6. Use vulgar words or sexual words that your child is not aware of.
7. "I go to meet a friend," I go out of my usual place, or go out without telling where I go.
8. Using a social media account, it shows an overly sad, passive, or somewhat intimate, anxious and aggressive figure.
"The first step in protecting a child from sexual assault is to be able to say anything to the child," said Trevor Manano, a safety expert.
In addition, such sex crimes are likely to become targets of children with busy parents. These children want more affection and can act without being seen by their parents.
According to Abdul Rahman, in cybercare, there are three roles for parents. Guardians, educators, and friends. Each role has its own purpose.
1. Protector role: direct your child's use of the Internet. Ask your child what he or she is doing on the Internet, whether it's ok to look at the messages and conversations that are sent and received online. But do not force them to demand such things. It may seem to the child that he or she is trying to suppress himself by using his authority. It is better to explain how to build trust with each other through these processes. You also need to know what kind of SNS account your child is using, what kind of site you are in, what your child is doing, and so on.
2. Educator role: You should give your child the subject of sexuality in an appropriate way. You may also use the SMART model developed by Kidsmart, the UK Internet safety program website.
Smart model
S - Safety. It should be taught that it is not safe to give personal information (name, email, home address, phone number, school name, etc.) to strangers online. It is good to be reminded that there are many people who are not online talking about their identity.
M - Meeting. It can be dangerous to actually meet someone you know only online. If you want to meet people online, talk to your parents first and meet them in situations your parents can supervise.
A - Accepting. Opening emails, messages, files, etc. from strangers can be dangerous. It may contain a virus or a pornographic message.
R - Reliable. People who meet online can hide their identity. Information found via the Internet is hard to trust.
T - Tell. If you are worried or feel uncomfortable, you should tell your parents, caretakers, or trusted adults.
3. Friends: If you have a good time with your child and have fun, it is easy to share your interests. Not only will the two get closer, but they will be able to open their hearts to parents and ask for advice when the child is having any problems or worries.
What if your child is a sex offender?
What do you do if you think your child is a sex offender? It is important to maintain a more calm attitude than anything else. When parents are frightened, they start to think that the child has said nothing.
Yao coach said, "Let's talk to your child and ask them to show you a conversation with the other person. "You have to know what exactly happened between the two and what happened," he said. "You should not blame the child or give the child a sense of fault. I have to make sure that my parents are not trying to scold me but to feel like I'm on my side. "
If your child still has the attitude to avoid or hide the conversation, tell them how much you love your child and tell them that you can trust them.
Also, when a child becomes a victim of sexual crime, he should not be discouraged. The first thing to do is to report to the police. Prior to this, you should ask your child if he or she can tell the police or other adults about the sex offense and if they are ready, you should take steps so that you feel safe about what the child said after opening your mouth.
Also today, laws and policies are in place to protect children in almost every country. Ask for help from a community or international child rights organization, and seek advice from sex crime groups.
To Prevent Sexual Crime
According to Potentas, it is necessary to teach your child the following things to avoid your child being subject to sex offenses.
1. Recognition: Let the child recognize the situation from the home to the child. It is also important to build close and intimate relationships based on love so that the child can trust his or her parents.
2. Protection: Above all, the safety and protection of the child should be given top priority. Remember that it is easier for your child to become a target of sex offenders when your parents are busy, and you should always give them time for your child.
3. Boundaries: You should tell your child what is 'good' and what is 'bad'. Let me also teach you when to say "no". It is a mistake to let someone else try to touch my body without my consent, and I need to recognize that it is a crime.
4. Resistance: Under these circumstances, sex offenders should be told how to resist both verbal and physical. It is necessary to educate the child who is in crisis to help out or to get out of the situation quickly by using some self defense.
5. Fleeing: If a sex offender follows you, you should flee and let him know where you should run. In the context of sex crimes, let me tell you that you must first find a woman and run away. Although there is no female sex offender, it is safer to flee to a woman if the sex offender is male.