Parenting is a time of life that has special relationships with and protects a daughter or son. Most families usually have just one child, two children, or even more children. However, regardless of the number of children, some parents can not deny that they have the children they care most about. According to experts, favoritism is an inevitable feeling, and it is always happening in front of our eyes. Dr. Barbara Howard, assistant professor of pediatrics at Johns Hopkins Medical School, said she was right. "It is impossible not to favor. "Recognition of favoritism is one of the greatest factors that promotes a sense of brotherhood." "95 percent of the world's parents have children with favoritism, and another 5 percent are lying," said Jeff Clugger, He said.
Sometimes children compete unconsciously to determine who is better. And when a child becomes a winner in the competition, the rest feel defeated because they can not take over their parents. "The child strives to draw the attention of parents who refuse themselves. "The more I push out the child, the more I try to get closer." "Parents do not give affection to the child or feel that way, because if they are aggressive, clingy, craving for love, or overreacting, and there is a child approaching the parent, I argue. This is because the fact that there is a favored child sometimes seems to be negative. But this is just a superstition that has long been exploded. Ellen Weber Libby, a clinical psychologist and author of the "Favoring Child," says that a favorable child is needed and in some cases preference shifts from one child to another. It means that it is perfectly good to show a certain favoritism to a child. Dr. Howard said, "We must escape the guilt of having a favored child. Most parents have a favored child. It's just a matter of letting that happen. " Regarding Dr. Howard's remarks, the only time it is negative to have a favored child is to take care of one child for life. Presumably, the pressure of love the child receives will be considerable. What is important in this topic is that there is a considerable difference between love and favoritism. Love and favoritism cause equity problems in the family.
"Parents do not want to acknowledge the difference between love and favoritism," Dr. Libby said. "I think parents are having trouble saying 'I love my children equally, but at times I have a moment to favor one child'. I favor the child. There is a moment when a child makes me feel like a successful parent. "The order of a child can also be a big determinant of favoritism. This was revealed by a survey conducted by Dr. Katherine Conger. He surveyed 384 households with children from several years. According to the survey, 74 percent of mothers and 70 percent of fathers admit that there is a moment when they favor a child. "Our research hypothesis was that the first child tends to be perceived as being treated differently because of their older age," said Conger. "The hypothesis has proven to be somewhat uncertain. As a result of the study, the first child comes with deviations because he / she experiences everything with the first parents. Conger explains that age is not important in favoritism. Children are always alert to those who are more interested in the order in which they are born. Of course, it is difficult to show love to children. Sharing love equally is another matter. I spend a lot of time with a child and can do many activities together. That does not mean that they are given the power and the right to ignore another child. You can favor a child but always love every child.