It is very hard for parents to raise their children at the age of self-control and self-control. Because they can not speak well or behave in a way that is contrary to the words of their parents or show their impulsive appearance. In this case, the parents can instantly shout or yell without controlling themselves.
But as you know, nagging a child with a loud noise is of no help at all. According to the 'Child Development' journal, making a child a noise can be as reckless as corporal punishment, and in addition it can cause behavioral and emotional development problems.
In other words, it is likely that it will cause destructive behavior in adolescence. Also, side effects may occur as children may also tend to rely on violence as they grow. In fact, according to a study in the Journal of Marriage and Family, children who often listened to their parents loudly for 12 months have a low self-esteem and a high risk of showing depressive symptoms and aggressive behavior to others.
After all, considering all these adverse effects, it is patience and calm to treat the most wise way for a child whose parents are self-indulgent. In this regard, one scholar advised a 'calm and decisive, uncontrolled way'.
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What is a calm and decisive non-controlled approach?
Jeffrey Bernstein, a psychologist and interpreter specialist, suggested this approach as an example of a woman named Susan, saying that a calm, determined, and uncontrolled way could be the best way for a child.
Susan has a 10-year-old son Robby and an 8-year-old daughter, Sara. The 10 - year - old lobby, however, did not listen to her mother properly, and once she squeezed her sister Sarah roughly. Susan, who witnessed this scene, rushed to the children and told the lobby to apologize to her sister, but instead of listening to her, the lobby mimicked her mother's words and made her uncomfortable.
In this case, most of the parents would be angry and screaming at the lobby's behavior, but Susan's choice was different. He took advantage of the calm and decisive, uncontrolled way.
First, I calmly and calmly told Robbie to apologize to her brother, and then told her to apologize to her brother in a determined tone. And finally, Robbie might not apologize to his brother, but said he would feel much better if he apologized. This is not a gesture that tells the child how to do it in the right direction, rather than force the lobby to apologize.
Eventually, Robbie apologized to Sarah for her actions. Of course, even though Lobby did not apologize for her sincere apologies, Susan praised her efforts and spared her encouragement.
This story is a real example of how loud a child can not be the ultimate solution. Even if it is not corporal punishment, shouting and making a loud noise can have a negative emotional impact on the child's growth.
This approach, of course, can be a stressful situation for the parent, but it can eventually have a positive impact on both the child and the parent. It is also good to improve the parent's perspective in child discipline. In addition, here are some tips to help parents manage their own minds.
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Instructions for becoming a good parent
1. Children sometimes deliberately misbehave. Before you get stressed, let's think that you had been a child before and that your parents had the same experience. Also, you should know that your child did not act badly, but in part to harass your parents. It is good to think of this experience as a kind of lesson and enlightenment that you experience as a parent.
2. It is better to avoid the root cause of anger or anger. For example, jumping and leaping from a sofa, eating at the time of eating, eating rice and not smoking, but small, but sensitive to the behavior of the parents to cause irritation can eventually lead to their own problems.
3. Be able to identify what is wrong with your child's behavior. It is good to find out the various situations such as whether the child is bored alone at home or feeling that his / her brother is neglected because he is a dual-income couple. When you spend time with your child and do housework, you need to involve your child so that your parents stay with your child and improve their bond.
4. In stressful situations, you should take a deep breath and do not stick to excessively. If you have to be angry, instead of screaming, count your numbers inside and breathe, or take a short walk outside and return. Afterwards, I solve the problem by talking with my child.
5. Listening to your child is fundamental. This not only shows the child's current problems, situations, and emotions, but also the factors that lead to the child's misbehavior. It also makes the child feel like they want to talk more with their parents.